#1: Boundaries: What They Are and Why They’re So Misunderstood

Mar 28, 2018

In this first episode, I want to begin laying the foundation for you to create your very best personal and relationship boundaries. So many people are either uninformed or misinformed about boundaries, and I want you to have all the information you need to help you feel more confident about how boundaries work.

Biggest Takeaways From Episode #1:

• If you’re feeling clueless about how personal and relationship boundaries work, or you think they’re selfish, rigid, or bitchy, you’re in the right place! Setting boundaries is the key to getting both the space you need and the connection you crave.
• Boundaries are anything that defines space between one thing or another. Doors, lines between lanes on a highway, or stop signs and lights are all examples of boundaries we encounter in our daily life.
• In relationships, boundaries are about creating protection—either for you or for others. If you don’t feel safe personally or in relationships, you can’t progress to higher level needs like affection, love, and self-actualization.
• When you start setting boundaries, be prepared for resistance and pushback. That means you’re on the right track!
• Results you can expect from better boundaries, and why boundaries are absolutely not bitchy.

In today’s episode I want to begin laying the foundation for you to create your very best personal and relationship boundaries. So many people are either uninformed or misinformed about boundaries, and I want you to have all the information you need to help you feel more confident about how boundaries work. 

Highlights from Episode #1:

• Welcome, and what you can expect from this and future episodes. The first 4-6 episodes will be devoted to the fundamentals of effective boundary work. [00:40]
• Intro to Vicki, how she got here, and why she’s so passionate about teaching boundaries. [01:52]
• Boundaries defined. [06:22]
• What are personal and relationship boundaries, and how they create safety. [09:05]
• How people in your life may react when you start setting—or upleveling—boundaries. [15:09]
• Benefits of learning better boundaries. [20:30]
• Myths and misconceptions about boundaries. [23:50]
• Boundaries aren’t a punishment, or telling another person what to do. [26:01]
• Preview of upcoming episodes. [32:35]

Links and Resources:

Vicki Tidwell Palmer

Moving Beyond Betrayal by Vicki Tidwell Palmer

Abraham Maslow

Maslow’s hierarchy of needs

Essentialism by Greg McKeown