Jun 2, 2021
People in your life may be
facing a variety of dangers, from mental health issues or suicidal
urges to addiction or unsafe behavior. But today, I’ll focus on a
specific type of danger: physically or sexually abusive
relationships. It’s painful to know (or suspect) that a loved one
is in a relationship like this, but it’s also tough to know what to
do. I’ll give you some specific advice on how to proceed—and what
to avoid doing.
Biggest Takeaways From Episode #136:
- Here are some things to do when your loved one
is in an abusive relationship:
- Express concern and your willingness to
- Give them a way to alert you that you need to
call the police or help them get out of the situation.
- Call the police if you know or have very good
reason to believe that your loved one is in danger. Don’t hesitate;
just do it!
- Send your loved one healing energy, thoughts,
- Ask yourself whether what you’re planning to do
might put this person in danger.
- There are also some things you should
avoid doing in these circumstances:
- Don’t communicate in writing about their
relationship or safety issues (unless it’s a time-sensitive
- Don’t suggest that the person in an abusive
relationship should go to couple’s therapy.
- Don’t confront or agitate the
- Don’t judge your loved one who is being
- Be aware that the most dangerous time for an
abused person is right after they leave their abuser. The abused
person should go to a domestic violence shelter (rather than a
loved one’s house) when they leave, because the shelter will have
resources to help.
Highlights from Episode #136:
- Welcome to episode 136! Let’s
talk about what to do in terms of your boundaries when someone you
love is in a specific kind of danger. [00:39]
- Vicki starts things off by
sharing some statistics from the National
Coalition Against Domestic Violence. [04:47]
- What are some things you
do when you’re dealing with someone
facing domestic violence? [07:20]
- Vicki talks about the most
dangerous time for someone leaving an abusive relationship.
- We learn some things that you
can or should do in this type of situation. [15:24]
- Vicki shares a resource:
the National Domestic Violence
Hotline. You can call or
text them at (800) 799-7233. [21:35]
- What if someone you love
doesn’t want to talk about it? [22:35]
Links and Resources: